BigNews.Biz - Jun 18,2009 - With only two weeks remaining before their prediction of the Apocalypse comes to pass, the Church of the SubGenius has taken the step of inviting controversial and popular political talk show host Stephen Colbert to join its ranks.
On Wednesday, June 17, 2009, Colbert exposed the mysterious and hidden cabal of world power brokers who comprise the Bohemian Grove on his Comedy Central show "The Colbert Report." In his report, he declared the Bohemian Grove to be a "total sausage fest," and expressed his desire to join an organization in which women dance around pagan statues in secret rituals.
In response to this statement, the Church has issued an open invitation for Colbert to take part in X-Day, its end-of-the-world festival. Since its inception in 1953, Church founder J.R. "Bob" Dobbs has predicted that a fleet of flying saucers will arrive at the beginning of July to destroy the worldwide Conspiracy against the Church of the SubGenius, while all ordained SubGenius ministers will be rescued by escape vessels piloted by the Alien Sex Goddesses, also known as the Xists. The Church is inviting all of its members worldwide to gather together for the final hours in Sherman, New York from Wednesday, July 1, 2009 to Sunday, July 5, at a clothing-optional outdoor campground called Brushwood Folklore Center. The first gathering at this compound took place in 1996, and the event has increased in size and participants each following year. 1998 was designated the first true "X-Day," and each successive year has added one to the total. This year's celebration in 2009 is X-Day 12, or X-Day XII. X-Day will be a celebration of free expression, performance art, rock and roll, pornography, and adult entertainment; and certain parts of the event will be restricted to adults only.
Church member Reverend Modemac, one of the festival's organizers, stated, "In contrast to the Bohemian Grove, we invite Mister Colbert to join us in a festival that not only has beautiful and nubile members of all genders, but is also steeped in conspiracy theory. Whatever conspiracy you believe in -- we have it."
The Church of the SubGenius is a popular organization often seen as a "parody" of religious cults, including Scientology, the Raelians, and the Unification Church. It was founded in 1953 by a mysterious figure named J.R. "Bob" Dobbs, whose smiling, pipe-smoking image has been seen worldwide in chip art, graffiti, tattoos, and rock albums from performers ranging from Devo and George Clinton to Sublime. A number of celebrities are SubGenius ministers, including former Talking Heads singer David Byrne, Penn Jillette, Robert Anton Wilson, and Pee-Wee Herman.
The Church has issued a prediction that invading aliens from outer space will arrive on Earth on July 5th, 2009 (or "X-Day"), and that only the ordained members of the Church of the SubGenius will survive the oncoming cataclysm. Membership in the Church costs $30 USA, and Stephen Colbert will be required to pay this membership fee in order to join.